Fathers regret abortion too! PDF Print E-mail

Catherine coyle, Ph.D describes the effect of abortion on men in her article, “Post-Abortion Trauma in Men Still Overlooked.”

“Abortion may contribute to a host of problems among men such as anger, helplessness, guilt, grief, relationship problems, sexual problems, risk-taking behaviors (e.g. substance abuse), sleep disturbances (e.g. nightmares), anniversary reactions, clinical depression, and confusion about masculinity. . . .It does not seem too far-reaching to suggest that abortion has sickened all of our culture.”

Coyle says the far-reaching effect of abortion is best understood when you consider “that wives, and children of these men suffer with them and the very fabric of the family, our societal foundation, is torn apart.”

Posted on a webpage of stories of men with aborted children, the accounts of abortion trauma for men are heartrending to read.

“That day ripped my gut out and closed my heart,” says one man. He describes the lasting effects of abortion in his life.

“I can tell you that the mental and emotional effects on a man are real and devastating. I really don’t let anyone get close to me because I don’t want to let them down. I’ve had a divorce, no current relationship with my two living sons, countless unfinished projects, and several jobs left before true success—mainly because I never felt I deserved it.”

When he heard the personal testimony of a post-abortive woman in his church, God changed his life.

“Jesus Christ has forgiven my past and continues to strengthen me. I know that there is NO future looking in my rearview mirror and nothing in my past that I can change. My wife had nothing to do with my past, but she wants the best for our future and to fight and save as many untimely deaths as we can together. Her support has been immeasurable in the healing process.”

Another man who had coerced and threatened his wife until she agreed to have an abortion, had this to say about his own reaction:

“After the abortion, I felt some relief. At least the arguing over whether or not to have the abortion was over. But I was also surprised by my own reactions and feelings. I found that I felt guilty, like I’d stepped over a line that shouldn’t have been crossed. There was also a feeling of dread, of impending doom. I sensed that some sort of divine punishment was waiting for me, and it was frightening.”

Eventually his wife, who suffered years of depression and suicidal thoughts following the abortion, came to Christ and received God’s gift of atonement for all her sins, including the abortion. As he saw the transformation in her he too sought God’s grace and forgiveness.

“There is no sin so great that Christ’s death can’t cover it’s stain. There is no hurt so deep that God’s love can’t heal it’s pain. If you’ve done something similar to what I’ve done—forced a girlfriend or wife into having an abortion—God can forgive you. If you’ve been in my wife’s shoes and agreed to an abortion you never wanted, God can heal your broken heart.

Related articles:

    “Forgotten Fathers and Their Unforgettable Children
    David C. Reardon, Ph.D.

    “Post-Abortion Trauma in Men Still Overlooked
    Catherine Coyle, Ph.D.

Resources:

    Discovering Grace, PPL’s packet for abortion recovery ministry.

    Healing a Father’s Heart: A Post-Abortion Bible Study for Men
    Kathy Jones, Linda Cochrane (Paperback -1996) Available on Amazon.com or request a copy from PPL.

 

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